Play it Cool.

Currently Playing: Morning Wood - 88 Keys (not on the page though lol)
Currently Feeling: Idyllic

I have to backtrack on whatever I said in a blog a few posts back. I won't comment towards anyone, just on the actual comment itself. I think if people feel a certain way about you, then 70% of the time it's because you did something to make them feel that way.

I'm not too sure on how people perceive me.

I'm an asshole. But like I told my friend, I'm a good guy asshole. At some point in my life I realized that I didn't have to please anyone besides myself and truly ran with that idea. While running I hit a sharp rock and fell. I realized my jeans were scrapped (these are some friggin' Nudies!) and grabbed the rock. I inspected it and found out that it wasn't sharp at all. Actually, it was pretty round. I held it close to my face and read some tiny lettering on it that said: you aren't the only person on Earth.

Everyone thinks that no-one understands them. Which is slightly true. We don't seek to actually understand each other as much as we seek to find people we can tell stuff too. I'm no psychotherapist or anything, but we're all pretty much selfish. Lowkey selfish, but selfish nonetheless. All we think about is ourselves so when someone comes along that thinks about others just a little bit, we praise them. Mother Theresa anyone? Princess Diana? Shouldn't we all be doing stuff like that? Anyway, back to my point ...

We're all selfish but we downplay it a little bit. We might ask someone, "how was your weekend?" ... just to have a segway to tell them about ours. Sound familiar? We all do it.

Me?

I'd rather not entertain your thoughts if I'm not truly concerned. I want you to feel as if I genuinely care about what you have to say. If I don't, then would that be fair to you for me to entertain your thoughts and not care? Idk, maybe my way of thinking on that is twisted. I just see no need to front on my feelings. I try to be careful and not be too blunt though because I do dislike people who are mean for no reason. It's a revolving door.

Secondly, I kind of wanted to speak on a comment from my last blog.

"im going be honest i didnt read most of this entry.... it's just tiring. one week you're enjoying the single life and wanting the "player image" and the next you want to become " i need love" guy. i think it's all a facade .."

I'll be honest, the second part of your comment ( i didn't post it) was right on the money. I do need a girl to blindly love me.

BUT.

Understand this.

Nothing I say is a facade. I do need love. Well, not NEED love. DESIRE love. It'd be nice, most definitely. But to say that me being done quite sucky by a few women hasn't changed my feelings on women would be a lie. So I do enjoy the single life. And I can enjoy it while still being mindful of the fact that having a girl would be even more pleasing. I don't want to be a player. Ever. I've never cheated on a girl, so ... However, if I'm single, why not talk to 2 girls at once. If I was ever doing that though, I would tell both of them. I'm not someone trying to blindly lead someone on.

Everything I say in my blog is me, from top to bottom. I know I'm not the most adjusted person and at times can seem like I don't know what the hell I'm talking about. I do have it all in perspective though.

If my blog is tiring though, just save me the trouble of commenting. I say that sincerely, not because I can't handle a negative comment but because I know how messed up I sound sometimes. As a writer and a person ... that is what I can't handle.