Do my dirt like Kwame.

I'm screaming for independence. Well, not really, but sort of.

So I'm 20 years old, living with moms. Which really isn't anything to be ashamed of seeing as how I'm still in school and whatnot. Thing is, when I was living in the dorms the sense of freedom I had was amazing.

I know its like a rite of passage when you get your own place but factors inhibit that. Factors like ... lack of money, and the fact that my mom can cook her ass off! That definitely keeps me there.

Thing is, I keep talking about growing up and wanting to start my life ... and haven't taken any major steps toward it. I'm about to look for a full-time job, or at least one with better wages ... and save up a decent amount. Then, in January, I plan to be moving into these apartments for college students. They're really nice and it just seems like something I need to do.

The fact that I do so much talking and not enough walking angers me lol. I mean, looking at my life a year from now I honestly see myself at the same. exact. place. that I am now if I don't kick myself in the arse. So while I plan out ways to make sure that doesn't turn into a reality, I would like to imagine where I would like to be if everything worked out perfectly ...

On the business side I see myself with two mixtapes out. Getting major buzz in St. Louis, just crazy. Hopefully I have a job that I like, it needing not to be anything BIG. Just keeping the bills and rent paid. I want to get signed still, even amidst the industry in a "decline".
I think I'll still live in St. Louis ... well, I know I will. Have my own place for sure though. Getting ready to leave though, and attend college somewhere else in the country. I want to take a trip though. Maybe for Spring Break. Just go somewhere and experience, yehknow?
On a personal level I seriously believe I'll have a serious relationship by then too. Hopeful wishing, eh? No, I think I will though and that kind of makes me smile ... though I'm probably wrong. I'll be an uncle x2 too, so that's cool. Lets pray I myself won't have kids ...

I see now that they hate me like Kobe
When they probably don't know me
But then God'll show me
That for every bad wolf in my life tryna blow me
I can still be a man-u respect like Ginobli
As a kid growing up, swear nobody ever showed me
That my life is what I make it and nobody else owes me ...
That's intelligence that I learned on my own, man
Turned into my own man, made from my own hands ...
Everything I envisioned in my dreams
So its like im brand new, created my own genes
From my steps to my seams
To the dames in my scenes...

That's some regular ol' bull**** that will come out when you're forced to sit for a long time. I can't bring myself to write as much anymore knowing I won't have an outlet to record to for awhile. I did get a call on Sunday about my friend in Texas wanting to produce my mixtape. Really? People checking for me like that? Nah, not really. But I do get to believing that when I come I'm going to have an impact. So sincere lol.

Matter of fact, I'm about to go write a song called "nappy fro". Shout-out to Blu lol. Oh, and new post on www.whoresneverlearn.com. "Lyrics, lyrics, lyrics ..." Go comment please. :] $5 to anyone who can name the song my title is from and what it means too. I wonder if you all actually KNOW what your musicians are saying ...