closing shop.

Everyone has secrets. It's life ... and everyone has secret motives. Well, not everyone actually. But most people.

What sucks though ... are the people on the side of the people with the secret motives. They're the ones that get hurt. Innocent bystanders are usually the people that die, have you ever noticed? Not the ones doing the actual deed.

So ask yourself ... I know you think you're just a bystander, but do you think ... just maybe ... that you could actually be the cause of it all?

At any rate, I always speak in pretty much general terms when it comes to things going on in my personal life. I feel like that's always the best route, you know? Well ... I guess at some point this evening I realized that the online ish isn't as important as I always took it for, and well ... let's just start being a little more real.

So I like you. I tell you. You know. Everyone else knows. Crazy right?
I guess. But I hate being played the fool. I HATE it. The saying "momma didn't raise no fool"? She really didn't. So I don't know your intentions or anything, I really don't ... more because you never truly make them known to me.
But I know that you like him. And that is A-Ok with me. Believe me, this wouldn't be the first time that something like this has happened to me. I'd be lying if I thought this would be something different. I was hoping it to be. Never expected it to.
So now I'm at the point where I must question everything you say. Just because other people say everything the opposite of what you are. And I can't do that. If you are telling me the truth ... how could we ever be with me wondering if you're telling me the truth. If you're digging this other guy, if you're dating this other guy?
I'm GCB. Lol, no one on here knows what that means ... but that carries a little weight where I am. And I'm expected to be a certain kind of person. And I totally defy that, so that I can be the perfect guy to a girl like you. Or not like you. Any girl. Any girl that I deem worthy to be with me. Yes, worthy. Because I know the kind of guy that I am. But sometimes ... most of the times ... usually ... that means nothing to most girls.

So here I am forced with a dilemma. Shall I stay ... shall I go?
The latter.
I won't run. I won't quit. I'm just acknowledging when maybe it's time to stop.

Only you know what you want. However ... due to my inkling ... I think I must bow out.

And it's crazy ... because I don't believe that we'll be great friends after this, if indeed ... what I'm saying/thinking is true.
Why?
Because I'm probably cutting ties. To pretty much everyone.
The weight on my shoulders is ridiculous, and none of you have made it better. I know though, that that isn't your job. However ... you don't have to make it worse.

-does the ratchet dance

-revision

No.
You can do better than me.
Why would you want me in your life yo?! lol. No, really ... I'm nothing good for you. I'm like kool-aid and ... cake. I'm BAD FOR YOU.
Seriously ... I will hurt you at some point. I mean, that's what I do, no? I don't know. That's what I feel like doing to girls from now on. Like, N.I.O.S.R.F.A.B.S.